he laughed at me when I told him about my principles, my beliefs.. he suspected me doing these all good deeds for the sake of name and fame. for awards.he said i’m hiding my true self. the real me.
(sumpah saya hanya mencari redha Ilahi, mengutip pahala)
he said i am not pious.so, don’ behave like one. that’s why for everything I do as it is debatable either its a good deeds or bad ones, i just keep it to myself. never shared with anybody, so that i will not slide into this uncomfortably conflict zone where people think that I’m pretending. because truly, i never did things for name, awards?lame!
well, he and me are grown ups. I certainly convinced that we both have a same belief; what is wrong and what is right. we both know what is integrity and honesty mean. responsibility and accountability; and all terms denote good conducts. in general, without diving further deeper, we both know that what I am doing is all right.
at the surface. bottom part, the nawaitu part, just leave it to Allah.
Yet, why he must gave me that cynical and sarcastic looks while I do what he and me believe right?
ironically, he tried once or twice to persuade me to do things that he and me believe wrong!
what is right and what is wrong have clear distinctions. no need to decipher. no need to be debated. it is well known.
i’m not preaching. lecturing. giving out sermon.
i’m just sad and perhaps shocked that we don’t have a common belief. (though we might have different thoughts and ideas)
fikirlah sekejap, sebelum bercakap dan bertindak.