During my childhood, I used to keep everything to myself. Not saying that I don’t have anybody to share with, I do. In fact, a lot. Its just that I don’t want to share as for me it will bring nowhere. The hearing process will end up with ” O, I pity you” or “You should be strong/stronger” or ” O yeah?” while giving a spurious sympathy look.
I appreciate concerns and cares that have been endlessly poured onto me yet I am quite paranoid with all these concerns for I learned that people will always try their best to comfort you, in front of you. But, at your back, they turn to be more malice than your true enemy. So, whats the point of having a long sharing session when you know that it is obviously a feign concern?
I fed up living and being flooded with this kind of people. Yes, I am not good. And I am talking bad about you. But, do not try hard to pry for every single thing I talked behind you I normally talked back in front of you.
I talk and share with people that I comfortable. That I believe they are purely concern about me. To teach me new things, to motivate and rejuvenate my spirit when I down, to draw a wide and sweet smile on my ugly face, to cheer my day up, to make my life meaningful, to correct me from wrong, to judge me fairly.
I am thanking to Allah for giving me friends who are genuinely there and support me when I need them. Not to forget, my family who never ridicule my efforts in my struggles to be a better person. I would never have been this far without all these precious gifts. Alhamdulillah.
Not to wonder since we all know different people will have different attitudes and behavior. I couldn’t classify their behaviors or attitudes as wrong morally as it is too subjective, open to debate. But certain things in life we as civilized and well grown up human beings should know how to draw a clear red line to distinguish between good and bad.
We are no perfect. None of His creatures is. Therefore, I am trying to adapt with people around me especially those with finger-pointing attitude. Yes, every one of us has limits, defects but we do have something good too. Can we just like looking at the positive side of one and take it to rationalize ourself?
If you ever have thought to be saint- to correct and at the same time putting blames on people, please correct yourself first. Or, talk to the people that you are not satisfied with amicably. Problems arise and solved.
Finding mutual and bilateral solutions will make us a better human.